Menopause is A Real Bee-Yotch!

Good Evening Luvlies,

In a lot of ways, I am truly happy that I have been blessed to live in this day and time.  Now don’t get me wrong, there are times that I get super peeved about some of the shenanigans that I read about and/or encounter.

But today was not one of them.

Why? You ask.

It was my trip to the gym this evening that has me grateful for living in ’these times’.  No, it wasn’t the updated, state-of-the-art equipment that reigns second, only  to the rock hard bodies of the eye-candy that strolls proud as a peacock, displaying hours of their hard work for all to ohhh & ahhh over , but instead the honest, no-holds barred conversations that seem to occur spontaneously, while waiting for the class ahead of mine to end.

The conversations don’t happen on a daily, but every now and then I’ll be patiently waiting beside another woman who just needs to get some ’stuff’ off of her chest…

… today was ‘that’ day…

The conversation started off innocently enough.  You know, the normal pomp and circumstances – “how was your day?”, “couldn’t wait to get to class today”, “I really need this workout tonight”.    You know, all of that kind of stuff….

With all of the niceties out of the way, I made a general comment to this ‘Zumba Sister-friend’ about the temperature in the gym…

and the following conversation ensued….

Zumba Sister-Friend (feverishly fanning herself):  Girrrrrrl!  You think it’s nice in here?…. I’m hot as hell in here!

Me: (raising my brows in surprise, wondering where the conversation was going) Oh Yeah?  It feels pretty good to me…

Zumba Sister-Friend (continuing the frantic fanning) : Can I tell you?, since the start of this menopause thing, I get hot as hell!!!  All I want to do is ‘cold down’.….. I want anything ice cold!…. a tall glass of water with a ton of ice cubes spilling over the rim, a fan with a gazillion over-sized blades, an Alaskan glacier, all of the snow on the North Pole!… anything to ‘cold me down’

Me: (pleasantly surprised at her candor and secretly appreciative of someone who understands my daily visits to ‘hell’): Don’t I know it!  And it just comes on all of a sudden! No ‘just between us girls’ kinda warning! No ‘you need to get your arse ready, because I’m on my way’ heads up!  NOTHING! Just…. BAM!  One minute you’re good and the next minute – all bullshinanigans break out!!!  All you want to do is climb out of your clothes!

Zumba Sister-Friend (pointing in the direction of the free-weight area): My Husband doesn’t know what to make of it.  Most of the time, I’m as sweet as apple pie.  But when that inferno reigns down on me, I’m like a friggin’ hungry grizzly who hasn’t eaten in four weeks…and there’s no food insight for days!  This menopause thing is a real bee-yotch!

Me (nodding my head indicating that I am fully aware of her struggle): Don’t I know!  And the thing is, I’ve always heard the b!tching about the flashes – that feeling of standing with your feet nailed to the floor, while opening the oven door on Thanksgiving Day!  Has anyone told you about the exxxx-treme cold that follows!!  I’m talking about the bone-chilling, ‘where’d that heat from that damned flash that I had a minute ago!”  – COLD.

… To the delight of me and my Zumba Sister-Friend, the conversation continued like this for, at least, another ten minutes.  Both of us quietly grateful to know that we really aren’t crazy… just going through some basic shiggity and tom-foolery that has come to define this developmental stage of our lives….

And when it finally came that time to ‘get our Zumba on’, we strutted into the class like twenty-somethings without a care in the world…..

And, as I said earlier, It’s not every day that